Eaten by Dog.

There is no Sun Sign Horoscopage this week. Here is my absence note:

Distracted Astrologer has failed to work a Horoscopage-size hole into her week, and after a weekend visit from the much-loved Mothership Uber-Virgo, she needs to find a quiet corner in which to gibber. Listen carefully, you might hear her muttering no mum, I don’t have a special cloth for wiping the seal of my washing machine, on repeat.

Also, the annoyed banging and drilling sounds from the garage suggest that she’s been throwing a few bees around when she thought she was painting someone with honey. (See Pisces last week – she could do with taking her own advice). She needs a little time to decide whether to light  few beeswax candles and acquire a taste for mead, or simply chuck the tin of golden syrup at some velocity and a height of 6′ 2″ in the direction of the aforementioned garage.

Finally, her lovely Gemini son is one of the few lucky, lucky, lucky children whose school is not boycotting the SATS next week, so of course his well-used voice recognition software is suddenly convinced that this is the first time they have met. Although charmed and delighted to make his acquaintance, it doesn’t have a clue what he’s on about. She needs to spend a chunk of this evening convincing, in turn, the VR software that it’s Tuesday already, and Mercury is now direct. And doing something with that half-empty bottle of Chianti that’s peering over the screen.

Distracted Astrologer will be back later in the week, when she hopes to have found her mislaid First Person narrative. Meanwhile, she promises that you will not step out of the front door and into a deep hole filled with snapping Audrey Twos tomorrow morning. Not all of you, at any rate. We have a New Moon wish day next Friday. She’ll pop back before then with some ideas, in case you’re short of something to be careful what to wish for. Is that even grammar?

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Eaten by Dog.

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4 Responses to “Eaten by Dog.”


  1. 1 Kimberly May 16, 2010 at 10:27 pm

    Pls. subscribe me. Thanks.

    • 2 distractedastrologer May 17, 2010 at 8:22 pm

      Hello Kimberly, nice to meet you. If you’d like to know when I update the site you could follow on Twitter or facebook (links to the right somewhere) otherwise just pop along on Mondays or late Sundays, there’s usually something around then. Bests.

  2. 3 Kristin May 27, 2010 at 2:20 am

    Always LOVE your wonderful and very entertaining weekly scriptures and looking forward to your refreshed, well-vacationed mind .. tuned in after the glorious full moon in Sagitarrius. Feel tempted to wonder about the Galactic Core. You are adored.


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